Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening

It's an expansion to Dragon Age: Origins and the most boring villains in the world are back, the darkspawn. You've killed the archdemon and everyone says the darkspawn will go back home, deep underground and do what they do until the next Old God is found. But they didn't. Now some of them can talk! And they're led by a sentient darkspawn named the Architect.

The Architect captures the warden early on so he can introduce himself. Apparently killing a god doesn't mean random jerks can't capture you, and he steals your equipment and locks you in a cell that you can easily escape from. But don't worry the game is scripted to give you your equipment back. Your equipment is scattered about the cave system you find yourself in and you'll recover it all. That is unless the game decides not to give you your equipment back and just destroys it instead. It's a bug, apparently a well documented bug, although it could be a feature since it's much more interesting for the bad guys to ruin your shit and run away than it is to capture you, steal your stuff, allow you to escape through gross incompetence, let you recollect your things while you kill everything in your path. I got to experience the "feature" and since real men only have one save game I couldn't go back and avoid a bug that should have been fixed last year. Great job BioWare.

Randomly half way into the adventure, there is a cut scene featuring a darkspawn monster factory called the Mother because the writers went home and let the interns do the scripting. Now for reasons unknown the Mother really has it in for the Warden. But it turns out that she really has it in for the Architect and there's no real reason she should have care about you at all. But it wouldn't really be an interesting story if the Warden was sidelined in monster politics. The Architect wants you to kill the Mother because she's worse than bad, and he doesn't want you to kill him even though you should just kill all darkspawn because they're horrible one dimensional monsters that exist to be destroyed by legitimate species and cultures. One glimpse into how darkspawn are bred and you'll see clearly why this is a race that can't co-exist with others.

At the end of the game you have to decide whether you fight for the nearby city or your castle. Which ever one you choose survives and the other falls. Boy I feel like I'm in a world where my decisions matter because some dude can write an if_then_else statement that sets a variable for the text displayed in the epilogue whether I fought in the castle and whether I made the uber sword or not.

if (uber_sword == made)
} else {

Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening, your data shall never grace the bits of my hard drive again. The bits rejoice.

By: Brock | On: Tue, November 29th, 2011 - 03:23 PM